Snark Scribe

Not all of us can meet people of quality

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Mass Shunning

My co-worker Molly came into work Monday and told me she had the most awful weekend. At the formal party she attended Saturday night, her date expressed surprise that she had romantic feelings for him.

Her reaction: "Are you retarded? We've been dating for 2 months."

His response: "I thought we were just friends. I had no idea you liked me."

She was absolutely stunned. "WTF? You thought we were friends with benefits? You asshole!"

He was very affectionate with her in public, and all her friends thought they were dating. This revelation was a complete surprise to everyone.

While Molly was in the bathroom crying, Mr. Asshole tried to smooth things over by telling Molly's friend, "Yeah, she's a beautiful girl, and really nice, but I just don't feel that way about her. "

His PR attempt backfired. The news spread through the whole party, but somehow got twisted into "Molly's an ugly bitch and I don't want to be with her."

Everyone gave him the cold shoulder, and disinvited him to their Superbowl parties the next day.

After Molly went home, she got phone calls all weekend asking how she was feeling. Mr. Asshole got messages from people chastising him. Even his frat brothers, stereotypically known for their "bros before hos" philosophy, called him and said, "That's not cool, man."

A large section of the Greek population at school hates him now. Molly sniffed to me, "Karma got him back quick. I don't feel bad for him at all."

Neither do I.

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