A Terrible Name for Your Child

A co-worker told me a story about a class he took in college. On the first day, the professor called roll. As he read off the list of names he reached one that gave him pause.

"Um," he said hesitantly, "I'm not sure how this is pronounced so I'll say it the way it's spelled. Is there a Shithead here?"

A girl stood up and said, "Professor, it's pronounced Shuh-theed."

Six Things Meme

I am not fond of memes. They remind me of chain letters. However, I have been tagged by Rae at The Notice, and she is a very nice, persuasive person and I can't hurt her feelings.

Here are the Rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules on your blog
3. Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself
4. Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs
5. Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.


1. My left pinky finger is the same length as my right index toe.

2. At this moment I have 3 cases of bottled water in my bedroom because I drink water like a camel.

3. I am going to make chocolate chip cookies with orange sprinkles tomorrow night because I can't wait until Halloween.

4. I wash face towels after every use, bath towels after every other use, and hand towels weekly.

5. Everyone thinks my white laptop is a Mac, but it's a PC.

6. There is a plate of doughnuts on my nightstand, but they are not really edible.

Rules were meant to be broken. I don't want to deny anyone the pleasure of doing this meme if they choose to, so I'm not going to choose 6 and exclude all the others. =)

Subtle or Non-Subtle Advertising?

I find the little digital scrolling display on gas stations creepy now.

They normally say, "Insert card" or something to that effect, and run ads like "Nachos inside!" while you're pumping gas.

The other day I saw one that said "We've got it right inside. Oh thank heaven."

I still don't know what they were selling.

My Co-Workers Have a Weird Sense of Humor

One of the students in my lab is pre-med. He hasn't decided what his specialty in medicine will be, but everyone is trying to convince him to become a gynecologist.

Why? Because his initials are VAG.

At lunch today, people gave him helpful suggestions such as:

"Wouldn't it be cool to have a name tag that says Dr. Vag?"

"You could open up a women's clinic and call it 'The Vag Center.'"

"You can get a license plate for your car that says VAG MAN."

This is what happens when geeks get bored.

97% New!

Today I saw an item for sale online. It was advertised as "97% new - used only 3 times."

Um, I don't think it works that way.

At least it wasn't underwear.

Yes, indeed, I have seen stained underwear for sale. :: shudder ::

Shortest Commute Ever

My classmate got a job in a rental office - in her apartment complex.

She just has to walk downstairs to go to work.

I think anyone with a 2 hour commute is just a tad jealous.

Political Graffiti

In a bathroom stall on campus, on the back of a door:
"Vote for Obama!"

Underneath, in different handwriting:
"Oh my god! I've been wondering who to vote for. Thank you, oh wise and omnipotent bathroom graffiti!"

A Literal Compliment

Someone, impressed that I was reading a book that intimidated him, tried to compliment me by saying, "Wow, it's like you're in grad school, and I'm in community college! Wait, that's probably true."

Please Don't Be This Man

My friend's roommate told me she was in a yoga class with a guy who wore a Speedo to every class.

Worse, he would blow his nose on his hand, and wipe it on his bare leg.

Shotgun or Bow and Arrow?

I was introduced to the mother of a classmate.

After meeting me, Mrs. Enthusiasm exclaimed, "Your English good! Easy for you to hunt a man!"

Yes, she said hunt.

She then chattered on happily, "You go to Hong Kong! You marry boss son!"

Um, thanks. That's definitely my backup plan.

New Blogroll

I've updated my links to other blogs/sites to more accurately reflect what I'm reading nowadays.

Sadly, some of my favorite blogs retired. However, I found some new things to giggle over.

Hobo Hideout

Yes, some more amusing wireless network names I've encountered during my travels:

Hobo Hideout

LALALA

Slugmedic

Little Fuzzy Dog

As I was walking home a little Pomeranian twaddled up to me and sniffed at my feet.

I was a little appalled when I heard someone say, "Kick it!"

Then I realized it was the owner calling the dog "Cricket."

Anti-Advertisment

Yesterday on the highway I passed a car with "Sorry boys she's taken" written on the rear windshield.

On one of the side windows, in the same shaky soap writing, were the words, "She's getting hitched!"

Congratulations, whoever you are.

A Healthy Sense of Detachment

My mother said that on the first day of preschool, rather than screaming and crying like the other children, I looked around the room calmly and then told her, "You can go now."

Yoda gets Hyphy

I think this wins for the strangest wireless network name I've ever encountered: "Yoda gets Hyphy."

Kidney Stones

My mother sometimes had unusual, but effective, parenting techniques. When I was a child, she showed me my dad's kidney stones.

"Okay, you see this stuff that looks like big grains of sand in your dad's pee? That's what happens when you don't drink enough water. Imagine how painful it is to pee rocks."

As an adult, people have commented about how much water I drink.

A Date at the Morgue

Someone whose father was a forensic pathologist told me that once upon a time his dad took his mom to his workplace.

Where she watched him perform an autopsy. On their first date.

Call me an old-fashioned girl, but I think anything involving dead naked people should wait until at least the third date.

Random Thought About Amputation

Another reason why medieval doctors were men: In the days before anesthesia, you wanted someone strong enough to saw through your gangrenous leg quickly.

However, excessive speed can be bad. I watched a British medical lecture where the professor recounted a very old story of a physician amputating someone's leg. In his zeal, he took off the infected leg, along with a testicle and a few fingers from the assistant holding the patient down.

Basque Circus Performer

Have you ever heard a story that kept getting worse? Someone told me they were hit on by a

forty-something . . .

androgynous . . .

circus performer . . .

from Basque . . .

who spoke almost no English . . .

except for pickup lines . . .

such as "You look like ze angel."